Since the beginning of this tour we've been struggling somewhat to clearly settle on the boundaries for the teams we need to visit. In the past there would have been many more clubs to get to, but over the years Greater London has slowly but surely advanced on the territory of what were Essex clubs. Indeed, some of the club websites still listed their team as being in Essex. But we've learnt over the weeks not to trust these websites, they are quite often left unattended and display out of date information.
This week we slipped up and were almost left without a fixture. We were minutes away from embarking on a trip to AFC Hornchurch when I realised that they are in fact now a part of Greater London and not our County. Luckily for us there was one other game available on this particular weekend. A game that couldn't have suited us better. We were off to see Heybridge Swifts host Grays, a stroke of luck meaning that we would now be able to see Grays play (Grays being another Essex team, derived of their own stadium so originally omitted from our list).
We set off early because we wanted to view the Tottenham v West Ham game before the Non-League fun began and rolled up at the ground a full 2 and a half hours before kick-off. Getting out at the currently empty car park we decided to see if the clubhouse was showing the game. We spotted the turnstiles, but they were closed, so just ambled on round the side and before we knew it we were in the grounds. It was strange, there were no other barriers from even stopping us walking down the players tunnel if we wanted to. I suppose the fact the ground even had a players tunnel was an achievement in itself. We'd go on to watch the Premier League game and then have the freedom of the grounds to wander out and take our place pitchside without having to pay an entrance fee.
Grays are currently managed by West Ham legend Julian Dicks, so perhaps it was no surprise to see him appear along with his squad to watch the game with us. We did perhaps wonder if this was the correct way for a team to prepare before kick-off as the Heybridge team were first to go out and warm up whilst the away team were fixated on the screens indoors.
As the Premier League game drew to a disappointing close with the score still at 0-0, attention turned to Non-Leagues first ever bookies unfolding to our left. It was the first one we'd spotted anyway, as a guy in a jumper that would surely not be worn outside of that clubhouse, set about chalking up odds for the first goalscorer for Heybridge that day. I wouldn't entirely trust his calculation methods though so opted out of a cheeky bet on the premise that the odds were being altered at an alarming rate every few minutes.
As for the game itself, well it was a peculiar match, one with little to go on due to the absense of a match programme (these are only available as you enter through the turnstiles). To make matters worse, wherever we stood we were staring into the sun so couldn't make out much anyway. Granted, we could have positioned ourselves on the opposite side of the pitch, but when you've waited a good few months for warmth at these games, you'd have to be a fool not to jump at the opportunity to be blinded in favour of a clear but cold view of a sub-standard game of football.
The majority of the Grays fans were in sync with us, standing as they were a little further down the touchline. Despite having to squint to see what was going on out there, they still seemed to know better than the linesman, and aimed their abuse in his direction throughout proceedings, despite the majority of the controversial decisions having nothing to do with him.
So with a lack of a teamsheet we identified the players in our own novel way. Heybridge were kept solid at the back by the presence of a fat Ian Walker look-alike, a sight not lost on a few others in the crowd who pointed this out to him with glee. Grays best lookalike was a Sami Hyppia type figure at the back, even though on the rare occasion he wandered over to where we were standing he actually only looked about 17. Still, Hyppia Jnr would be at the centre of the majority of Grays defensive errors, as he often attempted to foul his man in preference to going for the ball. He failed miserably at either option in fairness.
One redeeming feature was the fantastic yet unneccessary volume of the tannoy system. Because of this, ourselves, and anyone in the properties placed within a 5 mile radius of the ground were probably all aware that winger Lewis had opened the scoring for the home team after barely 5 minutes. Grays had started strongly but a swift Swifts counter had led to the enigmatic midfielder making a mockery of his portly size and outpacing the Grays backline to open the scoring.
Heybridges' second was a goal of pure quality, another pacy break and more controlled passing released Lewis again, only for him to this time cross for the incoming Reece Morgan to finish with a delightful header. 2-0 at the break, and really it was all that the Home side deserved, their patient build-up suiting the conditions far more than the aimless long ball tactics of Julian Dicks' men.
However, these two teams came into this game locked in mid-table, both on 44 points, and Grays appeared in the second half to want to prove that their hosts were not a better side. They pulled an early goal back and kept pressurising for an equaliser, only to eventually be the masters of their own downfall as another defensive error let in a Heybridge substitute to put the gloss on a 3-1 win.
Throughout the game balls kept flying over the hoardings, not an uncommon occurance at this level, and with minutes to go one of these balls fell neatly at our feet, with Bob taking the opportunity to grab it as a souvenir of our day out.
*pictures to follow shortly
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