Maldon & Tiptree FC v Ilford - 19/02/11

After a forced break last week due to Bob's romantic weekend away in Rome (I wasn't invited), we were eagerly back on the Non-League trail as Maldon & Tiptree were due to host Ilford.  Waking up on the morning of the game there was some doubt in my mind as to whether the fixture would go ahead after non-stop torrential rain all morning and most of the night before.  Still, we decided to persevere and head on over to the stadium anyway reasoning that if the game was called off, we could easily find a different venue in Essex to watch another match. 

It being FA Cup weekend though we decided to watch the Chelsea v Everton replay beforehand, so after locating the stadium we headed back into Maldon town centre to find a pub, and duly found one just minutes from the ground.  It was one of those typical local pubs complete with all the usual trimmings, the friendly barman, the one other customer, the child playing pool, the old friendly dog, and of course a brand new wall-mounted flatscreen TV with ESPN on it.  I only mention this pre-match outing as it almost caused us to miss the opening of the game.  Chelsea and Everton could not be picked apart and so the game moved into Extra-Time at about the same time as we'd usually be wandering the stadium looking a bit silly taking photographs of everything.  We decided we'd be really pushing it by seeing out events here so begrudgingly left with 25 minutes of the game still to play. 

We pulled up at the ground, added as many layers as we could on yet another cold, damp and wet afternoon in Essex, and were making our way up to the turnstiles only to see another guy there with his camera out taking a picture of the Maldon Town FC sign.  He'd beaten us to it!  Perhaps he had stolen our idea.  We really must focus from now to the end of the season and not chance this man beating us to the title of seeing a game at every Non-League game in Essex (levels 6-8).  Or perhaps i was over-reacting and he was just a sad, lonely man who likes to take pictures of signs.

Small stand but excellent playing surface

On buying our tickets and entering the ground Bob asked the man at the turnstile if he expected a big crowd today.  'About 6' he muttered, 'and you're number 5'.  He was less than enthusiastic but as we never told anybody we were coming here, he'd now surely see through two more people than expected.  Hopefully this would cheer him up a little.  He did point out though that due to the weather, this game was one of only three in the League that survived the poor conditions and was going ahead, so i guess we got lucky in picking it as our destination.

We opted out of walking around the ground and headed straight to the clubhouse to try and catch a bit more of Chelsea v Everton, taking our seats just in time to see Chelsea take a 1-0 lead in the first half of extra-time.  It was warm and comfortable in there and i was in no mood to move but we came here to watch a live game of football, not one on a TV screen screened from an Albanian TV Channel.  We found that in order to re-enter the ground we had to walk back around the outside and re-enter through the turnstiles.  Perhaps this was an attempt on their part to double attendances?

I think not only have we reported on the games from an unbiased viewpoint, we have also strived to provide a balanced opinion on every other aspect of each visit to each ground.  Today was no different and i can strongly recommend when visiting Maldon & Tiptree, to eat beforehand.  Sure, they had the usual array of items on the menu, but the burger was one of the worst i've tried so far, and don't even get Bob started on the size of his sausage he picked up that was also grossly overpriced. 

Just as the teams were lining up to come out we learned that Everton had forced a late equaliser in their cup tie.  So it grieves me to report that although we should have been taking our place in the stands for the kick-off of our game, we instead opted to watch the penalty shoot-out from the televised game instead.  We couldn't very well re-enter the clubhouse as that would mean yet another lap of honour in getting back into the ground, and the old man on the turnstiles really would be excited to count yet another 2 lads coming through to watch the game.  Luckily, the boardroom was nearby with a clear view to a TV.  Turning our back on the Maldon game became less deceitful as i promise that i simultaneously had a clear view of that match too through the reflection in the window.

The penalties over with (a shock Everton win in case you were wondering) we finally headed off to watch the game properly, having not missed anything of note barring a lot of early Maldon pressure.  I'm referring to the home team as Maldon instead of Maldon & Tiptree as not only is it less time consuming but Maldon themselves had yet to alter the huge letters above their main stand since the merger had only gone through at the end of last season.

We wanted to locate ourselves at the stand opposite as it was completely empty excluding one man who was spoilt for choice with where to sit.  Such were his vast options he obviously seemed confused as he opted to stand and watch the game instead.  As we wandered behind the goal during yet another Maldon attack it soon became clear as to why this man was alone, the complete end of the walkway was underwater with seemingly no way past.  Undeterred we settled behind the goal and tried to focus more on the game.

Once again it's difficult to report on proceedings as at the time of writing the match reports are yet to go up on each teams website, so we had no real clue as to which player was which and had to resort to coming up with our own nicknames or listen out for the calls from the players themselves.  What was clear to see though was that Maldon looked by far the stronger side as they passed the ball around on the floor continuously, looking for a way through the Ilford back line.  It was a credit to them actually that even from the goalkeeper, they rarely used the long ball, instead looked to play the ball out from the back into stronger attacking positions.  With their blue and claret striped kit, and neat and tidy short passes they could almost be compared with Barcelona.  Well, maybe not, but by the midway point of the first half they seemed to be in control and looked ready to put to shame Ilford's more usual non-league style of play of long balls and wayward passes.  It was also clear to see why this was one of the few matches played today, as the game was played out on a fantastic playing surface, which is not something we have been getting used to these past few weeks.



One of the joys of sitting in the stands at non-league football is listening to the people around you.  At a Premier League game you'll likely hear a mass of supporters urging their team on, shouting expletives at the ref or their own players, and generally getting caught up in the atmosphere of the game.  At Maldon we could hear the mutterings of a man disecting the cost of his latest phone bill to his wife.  They were clearly regulars at games such as this and it seems are rarely treated to too much excitement as when the man discovered that Ilford had two players on the pitch wearing number 18, he excitely pointed it out to his wife who responded with an exuberant 'well done honey!', before the two of them went on to talk about this subject for a good 5 minutes.



Two number 18's didn't go unnoticed by the crowd



Their interesting conversation was sharply halted though by a shock goal for the visitors.  After a 10 minute lull in play Maldon looked to be stepping up the pressure again when one of their midfielders slipped in the hazardous conditions and gifted the ball to the Ilford left-midfielder.  He sprung on a slightly disorganised defence and pulled the ball across the six-yard box for an easy tap in.  1-0 to Ilford just before half-time. 

After a quick nip inside in a desperate attempt to warm up, we decided to take on the challenge of getting a seat in this elusive stand on the far side for the second half.  We didn't want to stay behind the same goal as we were previously as Maldon would now be attacking the opposite end, and we expected a severe onslaught from the home team in the next 45 minutes.  There was no option to locate behind the Ilford goal due to the lack of facilities, with only a sloping, and very wet grass hill welcoming us.  It would be a great vantage point to sit and watch a game in the warmer months, but today we were after shelter. 



Bob's very own stand midway through the 2nd half



We made it over just in time for kick-off and once again Maldon's neat and tidy passing came into play.  It really was all very easy on the eye but they were just not creating anything.  The game lacked a spark, nothing was happening, this point emphasized by a guy coming over and chatting to the linesman about another game he would be officiating at the next day.  If anything Ilford looked dangerous on the break, and on one occasion even managed to string together 4 passes to a fellow teammate, that resulted in a strike coming off the outside of the post and running wide.

But Maldon's number 8 was slowly pulling the strings in midfield to positive effect.  Similar in style to Dimitar Berbatov (a little disinterested and lazy, but with great feet and an eye for a pass) he started to create a few chances, and in fact it was his sharp turn in the box that fooled the defence, allowing him to cut the ball back for an eventual well taken finish to level the scores at 1-1 with 25 minutes still to play.

Despite their dominance Maldon couldn't break down a clearly inferior yet organised Ilford side, who in fact somehow managed to strike the post again in the latter stages and you get the feeling that a draw really doesn't do either team any favours moving into the business end of the season.

From our point of view though, one of the finer venue's we have visited so far, impressive considering it is at the lowest league level we are focusing on.

Ticket: £8

Programme: £1

Score: 1-1

Attendance: 55

During proceedings on Saturday Maldon & Tiptree brought on a striker who was making his debut.  It turned out to be none other than fomer Billericay Town and Montserrat legend Ellis Remy!  We've only been to a handful of games but that's two players now we have witnessed line up for two different sides.